The way we interact is interesting these days. Sometimes I think we're dumber than we used to be. Sometimes I feel like we're actually smarter than we even realize. I think it comes down to knowing more than we can even say. Whether it's information about someone, or it's reflex knowledge, we can simultaneously multi-task more than we ever have before. And by "multi-task", I don't mean just talk on the phone and drive at the same time (not that you should do that anyway), but even in our relationships we multi-task conversations, interactions, and emotions with every person we allow into our lives. Is there such a thing as an intimate relationship anymore?
In Spanish there are two words for the term "to know". One refers to knowing facts and information, recognizing places, buildings, etc. The other refers to acquaintances, people, feelings. We can know someone's name or we can know who they are. In English, though, we only have one word: know, but we still use the concept of different types of knowing. There's explicit head knowledge and there's implicit, gut-level knowledge. The second type is the one we instinctively use the most, whether we realize it or not. The ultimate thing we, as humans, desire or even require is love. Love is directly related to the gut-level knowledge. It's a non-verbal knowledge we have. An intuition. This leads us to knowing whether or not someone we're speaking to is being genuine or authentic. It's how we separate politeness from being blunt and real.
Explicit memory is how we remember what the state capitol is or where Disney World is located. We can put words to it.
Implicit memory is recorded in our emotions, perceptions, bodily sensations, in the instances where words aren't as easy to come by. When we try to explain a situation (being in love, first trip to Disney World, etc.) and can't think of the right words to convey the feelings behind it, that's our implicit memory.
Looking at the realm of today's interactions, we feed off relationships, or our idea of relationships, maybe even more now than people did in the past. We count our Facebook friends and Twitter followers as if that is validity for success in life. But, are these relationships we're building explicit or implicit. Our feelings and our emotions are very, very precious things. They are things some people keep very hidden, and others not so much. They are things that, in essence, control any situation we're in. And, these are crucial when it comes to having and forming true, authentic relationships.
This is also true when it comes to our spiritual relationship, just as much as it does with our physical relationships. I haven't always felt this way, because I always thought my relationship with God took different effort than my relationship with my friends. In reality, though, any relationship is built from the same source, that gut-level, implicit memory.
Loving God shouldn't require conscious attention, it should be naturally encoded. It isn't that I have to show how I love, it's that I want to show how I love. We act on gut-level emotions without even realizing it, which is how a life in grace should be. His grace becomes the lens or filter through which we view everything, which even includes our other relationships. We do the same with people we love. You shouldn't feel like you have to do something with or for your best friend, you generally want to do something with or for them. That's why they're your best friend. Or your spouse. Or your sibling. Or whomever you grow close to.
We remember how important people in our lives feel about us not in words, but in our emotions, or our gut level. The Bible is full of great words and stories, but it's the feelings behind what God has done for me and the feelings I get when I understand I'm in his grace that really effect who I am.
Over time these memories and feelings become defined in our brains as patterns. We become attached to these feelings, these ideas, and they in turn become attachment filters. We start looking at things differently. These memories of relational experiences with emotionally significant people are entered into our souls and become filters that shape how we feel about ourselves, God, and even others, plus how we determine the meaning of events in our lives. Our priorities are effected. How we handle situations is effected. Our relationships are effected. It all depends on that filter.
For me, that filter is God. My relationships with others has a direct impact on my relationship with God, and vice versus. Our view of God and our view of how He feels about us is often an outgrowth of how we relate to other emotionally significant people in our lives. Our friends. Our family members. Anyone we allow into our close circle.
God is love. And, I hope I am and will be love, too.
we are free
Stand fast therefore in the liberty wherewith Christ hath made us free, and be not entangled again with the yoke of bondage.
Galatians 5:1
Galatians 5:1
winners//2012 BAFTA AWARDS
The closest you can be to the Oscars, without actually being the Oscars, is the Orange British Academy Film Awards, England's answer to the Academy Awards. This years awards, handed out earlier today (which was nighttime for them), are looking similar to what this year's Oscars will probably look like. Here's a look at the winners:
Best Film: THE ARTIST
Best British Film: TINKER TAILOR SOLDIER SPY
Best Actor: Jean Dujardin, THE ARTIST
Best Actress: Meryl Streep, THE IRON LADY
Best Supporting Actor: Christopher Plummer, BEGINNERS
Best Supporting Actress: Octavia Spencer, THE HELP
Best Director: Michel Hazanavicius, THE ARTIST
Best Original Screenplay: THE ARTIST
Best Adapted Screenplay: TINKER TAILOR SOLDIER SPY
Best Cinematography: THE ARTIST
Best Editing: SENNA
Best Production Design: HUGO
Best Costume Design: THE ARTIST
Best Film Music: THE ARTIST
Best Makeup/Hair: THE IRON LADY
Best Sound: HUGO
Best Visual Effects: HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS: PART 2
Best Foreign Language Film: THE SKIN I LIVE IN
Best Animated Film: RANGO
Best Documentary: SENNA
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